I didn't mean to hurt you, idiot
by Hotarukunn
Summary: Shinji don't want Sanada to go visit his parents, but he know that it will only be a burden if he say so. So he lies and tell Sanada that it's fine, that he don't mind. Written for the 7 lies-comm at LJ. Sanada/Shinji


**7 lies  
****Fandom: Prince of Tennis  
****Main-pairing: Sanada Gen'ichirou x Ibu Shinji  
****Minor pairigns: Yuushi/Davide, Kenya/Kaidoh**

**#1 – I don't mind.  
**The first time Shinji lied to Sanada was when Sanada was going to visit his parents. They had been living together for two months, and Sanada's mother had asked him to come home for a couple of days to help with the dojo. Or something like that, Shinji wasn't really sure, he hadn't really listened.  
Sanada had told him about it during dinner and Shinji had felt down after that. When Sanada asked "Will you be alright on your own?" Shinji was silent for just a moment, then nodded and replied that he would manage. When Shinji said bye to Sanada the following morning at the train-station, he felt his heart sink in his chest and once he returned to his apartment, he called in sick.  
Four days later, when Sanada called to ask if he minded it if ge stayed a couple of days longer – they were rebuilding the house and wanted their youngest son to stay and help – Shinji said that he didn't mind, not at all. He lay restless the whole night and longed for Sanada to come back home.

**#2 – I'm not suspicious.  
**When Sanada once more told him that he had to stay longer, Shinji almost cried out in frustration. There was something really weird going on, and he didn't like it. Sanada was acting strange. Wasn't he acting _too_ much of the good son?  
He got a visit from Amane, whom he had gotten to know during his third year at Fudomine, when both of them had been vice-captains, and the Hyotei's Oshitari. The two were on the way to Osaka to see Kenya and Kaidoh, and peekd in to say hello. It was the second week Shinji wax home from work under pretense of being sick. Amane wondered why he was pretending sick, Yuushi figured it out as soon as he heard that Sanada wasn't home. "You miss him. It's not like he has someone else in Kanagawa, you know." Shinji bit his lip and looked away, and Yuushi asked if he thought that was the case. "I'm not suspicious." Shinji replied. But he was, even though he knew that Sanada wasn't the type to do anything like being unfaithful just like that.

**#3 – I do.  
**Shinji wanted nothing more than for Sanada to come home. But he didn't want to tell him that. Sanada asked questions about work, and Shinji made up lie after lie about what he'd been doing – mostly saying "nothing different from usual" - and he acted as if everything was fine. Sanada asked if he ate properly, and he lied again, saying "I do." when in reality, he mostly stayed laying in bed with the phone beside him, just waiting for Sanada to call again. He didn't dare to call himself, because maybe Sanada would see he called from home and would ask if Shinji was alright or if he was sick, and then Shinji would blurt everything out and tell him just what he was thinking.

**#4 – I'm sorry.  
**"I'm sorry for being selfish.." Shinji mumbled into the room, but he didn't feel sorry. He just wanted Sanada to come home, because he missed him so much. He pressed the pillow close to his chest and pretended it was Sanada, because it had his scent and it was not making anything better with his wanting for the others presence. He wanted Sanada with him now, not 'next week'.

**#5 – It's for the best.  
**Not 'I have to stay a couple of more days.' and didn't want to reply "I guess it's for the best. I'll be fine." because he wasn't fine at all, and he almost shouted at Sanada for not thinking of him. But Sanada's mind was simple like that, and Shinji liked the simple-minded person that was Sanada. He loved him, and wanted him for himself, and didn't want to let anyone up close.

**#6 – I understand.  
**He didn't understand why Sanada had needed to spend a month, over a month, at his family's house, but he said he did. He said it to anyone who asked, and he would continue saying it until Sanada came back home and was safe in his arms, until Shinji was safe in Sanada's arms, too. Because he slept bad, not at all or very little. The times he slept it was out of pure exhaustion when his mind crushed itself and he fainted of both tiredness and hunger.

**#7 – It's true!  
**"You're such an idiot." Sanada muttered as he fed an almost apathetic Shinji, who had refused to let go of his shirt ever since he got home. "I'm sorry I was away for so long. I didn't think they'd make me stay for over a month." He tried to pry away Shinji's hands again, but didn't succeed this time either. He sighed. "Shin, I'm not going anywhere, you can let go." Shinji shook his head and Sanada frowned. "From what I've heard," Sanada started. "you haven't been to work since I left."  
Shinji mumbled out that he was, whoever said that to him were lying and it really was true that he'd gone to work. Sanada shook his head and sighed again. "I don't believe that." he stated and directed the chopsticks in his hand to Shinji's mouth again. "Idiot." he repeated for good measure. "The least you could have done is eat, stupid."  
Shinji looked away, and Sanada tilted his head up so that their gazes met. "And I knew you were lying from the beginning, because you were too silent. There were too few details for being you." he kissed him and felt Shinji press his tongue against his, the touches intense and wanting. He put down the chopsticks and cupped Shinji's cheek. He had wanted to see him too, so he didn't really blame him, but he really could have told him the truth, and Sanada could have told his parents that he really did have to go home. They didn't understand the pull Sanada felt towards Shinji all this time, nor what held the two together, but he didn't know how to speak his feelings properly, except with Shinji, maybe because he was just as unused to showing affection as Sanada was.


End file.
